


And Out of All These Things I've Done (I'll Love You Better Now)

by Poetinprogress1234



Category: Legacies (TV 2018)
Genre: Cute fluff with babies, F/F, Josie is also a mess, Penelope has PPD, Penelope has ptsd, Penelope is a mess, They're teen moms
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-30
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:15:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25003756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Poetinprogress1234/pseuds/Poetinprogress1234
Summary: Josie was always the girl with the plan- that plan didn't always include being a single mom to twins at 16 but, well, here they are. Luckily, she's now attending The Salvatore school, a special school made to give teen moms a second chance at earning their diploma. There she meets Penelope Park, another new mother that is hiding a terrifying secret. Together, they work together to figure everything out, along with caring for their three adorable children.ORPenelope and Josie fall in love as teen parents
Relationships: Ethan Machado/Josie Saltzman, Hope Mikaelson & Josie Saltzman, Hope Mikaelson/Lizzie Saltzman, Jed & Penelope Park, Maya Machado & Hope Mikaelson, Maya Machado/Lizzie Saltzman, Penelope Park/Josie Saltzman
Comments: 8
Kudos: 71





	1. Gonna Pick up the pieces (And Build a Lego House)

"You don't have to go back so soon.", Elizabeth Saltzman reasoned, wringing her hands together nervously as she watched her sister get ready in the vanity mirror. "Mom and Dad said so. They said you should rest at least another week or so- you went through major surgery, Jo." Josette Saltzman turned to her sister, the soft smile on her face a juxtaposition of the eyebags under her bloodshot eyes. For the first time since they'd arrived home from the hospital, Josie was out of the sweats and t-shirt that Lizzie was used to seeing her in; Instead, she was dressed in a plain blue sweater and jeans, an infinity scarf around her neck. Besides her tired facial features, Josie looked almost happy. "I have to go back before I get too comfortable sitting around the house all day.", Josie explained, swiping a chapstick across her dry lips. "Just because I'm a mom now doesn't mean I can give up school. I want to give the best of everything to them, and I can't do that without my diploma." "But it's only been five weeks!", Lizzie exclaimed loudly, cringing when the sound of two little voices screeching came from the adjacent room. Josie sighed, standing from the vanity and crossing over into the room, Lizzie on her heels. 

"Aww, my sweet little Belle-Bug, did your auntie wake you?", Josie cooed, picking up one of the twins from inside their crib. The baby curled into her mother, tiny fists tucking into her body as she calmed in Josie's arms. Lizzie reached inside the crib for the second baby girl, gently rocking her as she walked around the room, placing a kiss upon her head. Josie placed the baby in her arms on the changing table. "I'm going to be fine, Lizzie.", she assured her sister, unsnapping the babies onesie. "Besides, the reason I'm going to this school is because it's filled with girls just like me. Belle and Aurora will be taken care of while I go to class, and it gives mom and dad some time off of baby duty." Josie handed the newly-changed baby to Lizzie before swapping out for the one still fussing in Lizzie's arms. When she was done, she placed both babies in their car seats, placing a pacifier in their mouths. Lizzie sighed heavily, running a hand through her hair. "I just worry, Josie. We've always gone to school together.", Lizzie whined, crossing her arms over her chest. "I don't know how I can just not worry about you and the girls all day." "Which is exactly why Hope is coming in an hour to keep you busy.", Josie said with a wide grin. Lizzie stared at her sister, eyes widening. "You won't even think about us with all the 'fun' you'll be having with her." Lizzie opened her mouth to object, but another voice cut their conversation short. 

"Don't even think about it, Elizabeth; You know the rules about love interests in this house.", Caroline scolded, staring sternly at her youngest daughter. "You and Hope can have just as much fun downstairs in the living room." Lizzie groaned, throwing her hands up in exasperation. "I swear, with you and dad, it's a miracle Josie even got pregnant.", she grumbled, earning a smack on her shoulder from the girl mentioned. Caroline sighed, bending down to strap her granddaughters into their car seats. "It's because of these two little babes that we have rules like this for you, Elizabeth.", she explained, standing back to her feet. "And it will apply to Josie, too, eventually. If your father has his way, probably until the time you're thirty." Caroline glanced down at her watch, checking the time displayed. "Speaking of your father, he's downstairs waiting.", Caroline said, taking one of the car seats from the floor. The baby inside cooed, bringing a smile to Caroline's face. She turned to Josie, frowning at the absentminded look on her face. "You ready to go, sweetheart? We don't want you to be late for your first class. Plus, I'm sure they have paperwork for you to sign for the girls." Josie snapped back to reality, nodding as she picked up the other car seat from the floor. She forced a smile, tried to hide how shaky her hands had become. "Yeah, mom, I'm ready to go." 'I think', Josie thought to herself nervously. 

Caroline and Alaric took care of putting the babies in the car, giving their daughters a moment to say goodbye. Josie pulled her sister into a reassuring hug, squeezing her tightly. "We'll be home before you know it.", Josie assured her, swallowing down her fears to comfort Lizzie. "Enjoy watching a tv show that isn't rated G for a while, and tell Hope I said hi." Lizzie laughed softly, wiping unshed tears from her eyes. "I will; And you tell that caretaker person if anything happens to my nieces, I will riot."  
Josie shook her head, laughing. "Will do." She gave Lizzie one last hug before getting into the passenger seat of the car, watching her mother and sister wave to her from the curb. "Love you, Jo!", Lizzie called out, right before Alaric pulled out of the driveway and pulled onto the main road. "You nervous, kiddo?", Alaric asked, watching his daughter out of the corner of his eyes. Josie thought for a moment, before shaking her head no. "This will be good for us- all of us. I don't know how, but I can feel it.", Josie admitted, turning back to look at her two sleeping babes. 

She knew no matter what happened, Josie would do it all for them.  
____________________________________________________________________  
"Please stop screaming, Micah.", Penelope Park begged, holding her newborn son in her arms. She was already going to be late, she knew; The batteries in her alarm had gone out sometime during the night, and she wouldn't have even woken up if it wasn't for her newborn's cries. Penelope had hoped that after nine weeks, she would have adjusted to being a mom, but it was harder than Penelope had imagined. Babies didn't come with training manuals, she'd learned. She'd gotten by guessing what baby Micah needed, but there were some times that no matter what she did, her son would simply cry until he eventually fell asleep. It was in those moments when Penelope rested with her son in her arms that she finally felt that overwhelming love she already had for the little boy. Of course, Penelope loved her son, and she knew all the sleepless nights and frustration was worth it for his wellbeing; Still, she wished that it wasn't so damned hard. Penelope grabbed the bottle off of her dresser, carefully holding it to the baby's mouth. To her relief, he didn't refuse it a second time, and within moments the screaming ended. 

It was during that time that her cousin decided to arrive, taking one look at Penelope's frazzled state before taking the baby from her arms. Penelope sighed with relief, collapsing onto the bed. "Thanks.", she murmured, watching Jed hold the boy to his chest as he fed him. "Have you even showered yet, Pen?", Jed asked with concern, looking his cousin up and down. "You're gonna be late for school again." "The alarm clock broke and he woke up screaming and-", Penelope began to explain, only to be cut off as Jed threw clean clothes in her direction. "Less talking, more hurrying the fuck up.", he commanded, wincing before apologizing to the small baby in his arms. Penelope rolled her eyes- her son was only two months old, yet Jed was already practicing being conscious of what he said around the infant. "Right- can you change him for me, please? Oh, and be careful cause he has a diaper rash again. Shit, I haven't even packed his diaper bag-" "Pen, don't worry about it", Jed assured her, already grabbing the baby's things from Penelope's stash. "Go shower, and leave little man to me." Penelope thanked him profusely before racing to the bathroom, closing the door behind herself. 

When she'd returned from getting dressed, she was pleasantly surprised to find Jed had kept his word. Micah was changed and ready to go, both Penelope's school bag and the baby's diaper bag sitting near the front door. Penelope hugged her cousin tight, causing the boy to chuckle at her gratitude. "Yeah, yeah; You're forever in my debt.", he joked, pulling away from Penelope and handing the baby back to his mother. "stroller is out in the hall- If you leave now, you can make it when the next bus comes." Penelope nodded, thanking him once more before grabbing her bags and locking the door behind herself as she left. She carried the stroller down the stairs carefully before setting Micah inside and walking down to the bus stop. 

Penelope often thought about how grateful she was for her cousin's assistance. When she'd found out she was pregnant, he had vowed to always be there for her and the baby, no matter what; Now, 10 months later, he had kept that promise. He'd even found and put a down payment on the apartment she was staying on after Penelope's religious parents had kicked her out of the house. He had been the one to defend her to their family, threatening to never speak to even his parents again if they disrespected Penelope in any way. He was also the only person by Penelope's side during Micah's birth, coaching Penelope into bringing her son earthside. Without him, Penelope had no idea how she'd ever be able to take care of Micah- to raise him how she knew he deserved. Because of him, Micah would always know that he was loved, and Penelope didn't have to go through the struggle of being a parent alone. It wasn't much, but it was what Penelope could give her son, and it had to be enough. Even though Penelope knew she would give her son the world if she could.

And she hoped with her whole heart that someday, she would.  
_________________________________________________________________________  
"You can place them in one of the cribs over there.", the cheery woman instructed, leading Josie and her father through the daycare center. Josie laid both babies into a blue crib, using all of her strength to tear herself away from their side. She knew that being separated from her daughters for the first time wouldn't be easy, but Josie didn't think the panic in her chest would ever fully go away. What was she thinking, letting strangers take care of her children? Josie felt like the worst mother in the world. Alaric, seeing the change in his daughter's mood, squeezed her hand into his own, placing his hand lovingly on her back to guide her away from the sleeping children. "They're going to be just fine.", he assured her. "These people are certified to take care of babies; And you can always come see them during lunch and breaks." "I know, it's just hard to leave them.", Josie admitted, swallowing hard. Alaric sighed. "I remember when your mom went back to work after you and Lizzie were born- she called twelve times a day for weeks just to hear you guys breathing. But you were also in my care, so her fears were understandable. Here, though? You have nothing to worry about, baby." "Just...I need to see them one more time- I promise I won't be late for class." Alaric nodded, letting go of his daughter's hand. "Go ahead, kiddo; I'm just going to finish up paperwork over here. Josie left his side, returning to the crib where her babies lay. 

Josie ran her fingers over Aurora's chubby little cheeks, then her head of chestnut brown hair. She turned to Belle, patting the baby's tummy as she fussed in her sleep. They were already so much bigger than when Josie first held them in her arms after her c-section, mirror images of each other. It was hard to remember now a time when they weren't Josie's whole world like there was always a part of them that had been with Josie from the very beginning of time. They were so tiny, so innocent, and they were Josie's; It was hard to believe that she had created such small little angels. How was she ever supposed to let them go, even for a few hours, when they were the pure personification of her soul?- it was like asking Josie to live without a heartbeat.

"It gets easier.", a voice said from behind, before laying a baby just a little bigger than the twins into the crib next to Josie. The raven-haired girl placed the diaper bag on her shoulders down on the floor, turning to Josie and her babies. "The staff are cool about letting us come to see them- they understand how hard it is being away from our kids. I was a bit skeptical at first, too, but they take good care of them here. Seems like my son doesn't want to leave sometimes." Josie sighed heavily, gripping the crib railing tightly. "How do you do it? Leave them, I mean?", Josie whispered, her voice cracking slightly. "It feels like my heart is breaking." The girl hesitated, before placing a careful hand on Josie's shoulder. "Honestly? You just gotta remind yourself that they're safe, and you have work to do. That's what I tell myself.", the girl explained. "Micah is my life, but school is important for both of us." The bell rang distantly signaling the first period, yet Josie was still unable to walk away. The girl held her hand out to Josie, offering a small smile. "C'mon- I'll walk you to class. That way you don't have to go alone." Josie nodded slightly, leaning down to kiss her girls one last time before taking the girl's outstretched hand. The girls walked from the daycare building to the school building together, distracting each other until they arrived at Josie's first class. Josie stood awkwardly in front of the classroom, looking up sheepishly at the girl in front of her. "Thanks for that- most people wouldn't care that much about a stranger and her feelings." The girl smiled. "We look out for each other here.", she explained, rubbing the back of her neck nervously. "I'm Penelope, by the way." "Josie", the latter girl responded, thinking of what to say next. Thankfully, she didn't have to speak again, because the second warning bell sounded, kicking them both into gear. Penelope turned to walk down the opposite hallway, but not before looking back at Josie with a fond smile. 

"See you around, Josie."


	2. If Things Go Wrong, We Can Knock It Down

Josie learns quickly that there is a lot to be expected of her at the Salvatore school, and she finds that she doesn't quite mind the load of work she's assigned. Keeping her hands busy keeps her mind busy, and when her mind is busy she finds herself worrying about the twins a little less. The thought of them was always there, but when she was in class, Josie felt like a teenager again for the first time since Aurora and Belle had been born. Josie had expected the other girls to judge her, or to at the very least be suspicious of her- but everyone she met was surprisingly very welcoming to Josie. In her first class, she met Jade, a seventeen-year-old girl with a six-month-old baby girl. Jade was training to be a nurse, Josie learned, while also coming to the Salvatore school. "Thank god the daycare is open until 10.", Jade had commented, tapping her pencil rhythmically against the desk. "They watch Emery while I go to training, and then, I pick her back up on the way home. I'm telling you, they're literal angels." In her third period, she met Wendy. She'd noticed the book the girl was reading and commented on it, launching into a conversation between the two. Josie had realized that the two of them had a lot in common, and she'd shared pictures of the twins while Wendy shared pictures of her 3-month-old son. As the day progressed, Josie began to feel that the Salvatore school was a place she could truly belong. It was a large improvement from the school she had attended before the twins were born. 

Josie had left Mystic Falls high in the middle of her sophomore year, due to the uproar her pregnancy had caused. The other students had ridiculed Josie, to the point that Lizzie became her bodyguard, walking her to and from classes. She'd had crude things spray-painted on her locker, been purposefully knocked into in the halls, and the boys would make sexualized remarks to her that made Josie's ears burn. It became routine that Josie would hear people whispering her name in the halls, calling her a slut as they walked by, and even asking if she knew who the baby's dad was. It had humiliated Josie, especially because she did know who the baby's father was- everyone did. While Josie lost her friends, her grades, and her figure, her ex-boyfriend was able to continue life, unbothered. The ignorance hurt worse coming from him, Josie realized. Her babies were the act of what was supposed to be one of the most special nights of Josie's life; Instead, they were a reminder of how stupid Josie had been to trust the boy she thought loved her with his whole heart. Since then, her ex had seen his daughters twice- once at their birth, and when Josie walked past him in a crowded grocery store with her mother. Besides that, Josie had accepted her position as a single mom, still secretly hoping that Ethan would come to his senses- for their daughters' sake.

Once lunchtime rolled around, Josie entered the daycare and was warmly welcomed by the afternoon staff. They swooned about how adorable the girls were, how good they had been while Josie was away, and then left Josie to visit with them. Josie peeked into the crib to find Aurora smiling up at her, cooing happily. Belle, however, had fallen asleep with her fist against her mouth. Josie left her sleeping daughter, picking up Aurora and holding the babe against her chest. "Mommy missed you so much, Rory.", Josie whispered, patting her daughters back gently. "Thank you for being such a good girl. No, you cannot have my earring." Behind her, Josie heard a soft chuckle, followed by a baby's babbling. Josie turned around to find the girl she had seen that morning- Penelope- sitting in a chair rocking her baby. "I had a feeling I'd see you here.", Penelope commented, her eyes shifting from Josie to Aurora. "How has your first day been?" Josie took a seat in the chair next to Penelope's, her pinkie finger caught in Aurora's weak grasp. "It's been really good- better than I expected.", Josie admitted, looking down at the baby in her arms. "I missed these two so much, though. I've never been away from them for more than an hour or so." "How old are they?", Penelope asked, to which Josie responded curtly. "I guessed around six or seven weeks. Micah's tiny for his age, but he's already nine weeks. Your girls are beautiful, by the way; They look so much like you." Josie smiled, her eyes returning to Penelope. She peered over at the baby in Penelope's arms. "Thank you. Your son is so handsome- Micah, was it?" Penelope nodded. "Is red hair a recessive gene, or does he take after his father?", Josie joked, expecting Penelope to laugh as well. Instead, Penelope tensed, the smile fading from her features. 

"It's a recessive gene.", Penelope mumbled, standing from the seat and placing Micah back into the crib. "I just remembered- I have a project to do. I...I have to go." Josie frowned, not believing Penelope's lie. She could see Penelope's hands shaking at her sides, the rigidness in her stature. "Are you okay, Penelope? Was it something I said?", Josie asked, trying to encourage Penelope to speak, but Penelope shook her head firmly. "I'm sorry, I just really have to go.", she insisted, picking up her bookbag from the floor. "See you around, Josie." Before Josie could say another word, Penelope had fled the building. Josie sat in confusion, wondering what it was that caused the sudden turn in Penelope's demeanor. She sighed, holding Aurora to her chest. Maybe one day Penelope would feel comfortable telling Josie her story, but that day was not today. 

Whatever it was, Josie just prayed that Penelope would be alright.  
_____________________________________________________________________  
"Pick up goddammit", Penelope whispered, shifting uncomfortably as she heard the phone ring against her ear. Of all the times her cousin decided not to answer his phone, this was probably the worst of them. Penelope felt the air in her chest ditch her lungs, each breath becoming more strained by the second. How had the bathroom gone from cool to a sauna in the eighth of a second? Penelope laid her head against the stall, concentrating on her attempts to even out her breathing. At last, Jed's groggy voice filled her ears. "Penelope? You're supposed to be in class.", he stated in confusion, before noticing Penelope's panicked breathing patterns. "What's wrong? Are you okay? Is Micah okay?" "I can't breathe, Jed.", Penelope croaked out, bringing her hand to her throat desperately. "Someone mentioned...and I...", she tried to explain, but Jed had regained his sense over the situation, his focus on helping Penelope. "Breathe, Pen. Deep breath in, Deep breath out.", he instructed, listening as Penelope sobbed into the phone, still struggling to take in air. "You're safe, Penny. You're okay, and Micah is okay, and that's what matters. But you need to breathe, okay? You can do that for me, right?" Penelope squeezed her eyes shut, taking shaky, choked breaths. For a split second, Penelope was afraid she was going to pass out.

"That's it, Pen- good job. Just keep breathing, okay? Don't try to talk or anything, just breathe." Penelope listened to the soothing tone of her cousin's voice, her hands slowly stilling on her lap. The lightheaded feeling disappeared, leaving behind a dull headache. Slowly, Penelope's breathing evened out, and she was finally able to open her eyes. "Pen? You okay?", Jed asked worriedly. "I'm coming to get you guys, okay? Just give me a minute to get my keys." "No!", Penelope exclaimed, pausing Jed's actions. "No, the day is almost over anyway. I'll be okay a few more hours, Jed; I just...yeah, I'm okay." Jed was quiet for a moment, telling Penelope that he was deciding whether to agree with her or fight her. After a moment, he relented. "Wait for me outside after school, okay? I'm gonna get my dad's truck and come get you. There's no way you're riding the bus home today." Penelope sighed with relief. "Thanks, Jed. I'll see you later." "Take it easy, little one.", he warned just before the line disconnected. Penelope picked herself up the floor, staring at her reflection in the bathroom mirror, only to find she couldn't recognize the person in its reflection anymore.

Penelope wondered what was worse- slowly losing her mind, or herself.  
________________________________________________________________________  
"Hey, Josie's home!", Hope yelled, rising from the living room couch and helping Josie carry the babies through the door. Hope unbuckled Belle from her car seat, taking the baby into her arms. "How's one of aunt Hope's favorite girls", she cooed, bouncing the little girl gently. "You want to go see aunt Lizzie and aunt Maya? Yeah, I know you, I missed you too, bubbas." Josie followed Hope to the living room, rolling her eyes as her friend continued her onesided conversation with the baby. As soon as she'd entered the room, Lizzie quickly took Aurora into her arms, leaving Josie's empty. Josie sank into the couch, grimacing slightly, which quickly caught Maya's attention. Before she could concern herself, Josie stopped her. "I'm just sore from walking all day- don't worry, I'm fine.", she explained, stretching her feet out in front of herself. Maya nodded, watching Josie timidly as if searching for the right words to say. 

"I tried to convince him to come.", Maya admitted, heaving a heavy sigh. "I yelled at him, I begged him, but he refused. I'm sorry, Josie. I promised you I tried." "It's fine, Maya.", Josie assured the girl, placing a pillow between her back and the couch. "He just needs more time, I get it. I wish he was here with them now, but I have to believe he'll come around eventually." Maya shifted uncomfortably, avoiding Josie's eyes. "That's why I wanted him to come- to tell you in person. But since my brother's too much of a coward, I guess I have to." Josie's attention snapped to Maya, her heart dropping in her chest. "Tell me what?", she asked in a panic, anger flooding her sense when she recognized the guilt in Maya's eyes. It was the same look Lizzie gave her when she knew she was about to tell Josie something that she knew would hurt. 

"Josie, Ethan isn't in Mystic Falls anymore."


	3. My Three Words Have Two Meanings

The balloon that had been slowly filling in Josie's stomach popped, a burning rage taking over her previously calm demeanor. "What do you mean he's not in Mystic Falls? Where the hell is he then?", Josie yelled, standing to her feet. She glared down at the girl beside her, eyes narrowed and fists clenched tight. Out of the corner of her eye, Josie saw Hope handing off Belle to Lizzie, preparing to break up the confrontation. Maya held her hands up in defense, regret written in her features. "He accepted a scholarship to Ohio State. He left this morning.", Maya explained, her lip bit between her teeth. "I tried to convince him to stay, but there was nothing I could say or do to change his mind." "You should have tried harder!", Josie yelled, shrugging Hope's hand immediately off her shoulder. "I gave him time to be a good person and a dad to his daughters, and he runs 8 hours away like a fucking coward! If he wants to treat me unfairly, that's one thing, but they're just babies! Goddammit, they deserve better!" Josie felt the first hot tears fall down her cheeks, her view of Maya blurring slightly. Hope wrapped her arm around Josie's shoulder, sending Maya an apologetic glance. "Maybe you should go.", she said solemnly, to which Maya silently nodded and began to gather her things. Hope sighed, guiding Josie out of the living room and up the stairs to her bedroom. 

The second Josie sat down on the edge of her bed, broken sobs escaped her throat. She held her head in her hands, shaking her head in disbelief. Hope sat at her side, rubbing Josie's back in an act of comfort. "How could he just abandon them?", Josie cried the hollow feeling in her chest returning once again. "They're his kids- his blood, for god's sake. How can he just act like they don't even exist?" "I don't know", Hope answered truthfully, running her free hand through her auburn locks. "I never thought of Ethan as the deadbeat type either- not with how his family is- but I swear if I ever see his ugly ass face again I will knock his teeth in. That's a goddamn promise." "What am I supposed to tell them, Hope? They're going to grow up and ask about him, and I have to be the one to tell them that their father abandoned them. How am I supposed to help them carry a burden that big? God, I'm the worst mother alive." "Hey, no; You stop that right now, Josette Saltzman.", Hope said sternly, tilting Josie's face up to look her in the eyes. "You are so strong, Josie, and you're going to get through this. Fuck Ethan, okay? Belle and Aurora are better off without him because they still have a small army of people that already love them and would do anything for them." Josie sighed, leaning her head on Hope's shoulder. Hope ran her hand through Josie's hair, resting her chin atop Josie's head. "Right now, what the girls need is their mom. Everything else, we just take day by day.", Hope reasoned, squeezing Josie's shoulder tightly. "You're going to be okay, Josie. And I'll be here for you and the twins every step of the way." 

Lizzie entered the room moments later, nearly startling the two girls in the process. "I put Belle and Aurora down for a nap.", she explained, seating herself on Josie's other side, sandwiching Josie in the middle of the two girls. Josie had to admit, she felt a lot better with both of them at her side. "You would not even believe how badly I wanted to yell at that bitch, Josie. How dare she drop such news on you when she probably knew for weeks. Like, did she not think that you deserve to know your baby daddy is skipping out on you and his kids?" "First of all, don't call him that- it makes me feel weird", Josie said, giving her sister a stern glance. "Secondly, it's not her I'm mad at. Yeah, she should have told me sooner, but she's not the person who did my babies wrong. Ethan is the person we should all be angry with here." "Agreed. Which leads to my next question", Lizzie stated, a mischievous glint shining in her eyes. 

"What are we planning on doing to give this asshole what he deserves?"  
______________________________________________________________________  
"Thanks", Penelope whispered, taking the warm cup of coffee from her cousin's hands. She took a small sip, grimacing at the strength of the beverage. "You were out of sugar.", Jed explained, swirling the contents of his cup around carefully. "I put it on the list, along with milk and baby formula." Penelope sighed, curling her legs up on her side of the couch. "I've been so tired after work I've been putting off going to the store.", she admitted, running her hands through her hair. "The diner has been wringing me for hours since I told them I'm going to school during the day." "That's fucked up.", Jed mumbled, to which Penelope hummed in agreement, taking another sip from her cup. "I'll drop by the store tomorrow before I come over and get you some stuff." "You don't have to do that.", Penelope objected with a worried frown. "You already do so much for Micah and I. I don't want to be a burden on you, especially during your day off." "Pen, I already told you, no matter what your parents said you are not a burden- especially to me.", Jed reminded her, a seriousness in his tone that Penelope very rarely ever heard. "I know you don't like being reminded of it, but you're still technically a kid, Pen. You don't have to do all of this on your own- as long as I'm around, you never will."

Penelope relented, staring into the contents of her cup. "I appreciate you, Jed.", she said, heaving a heavy sigh. "Especially for earlier; God, I thought I was done with panic attacks." "Dr. West said that they're usually caused by something.", Jed stated, watching Penelope with curious eyes. "Do you know what triggered it?" Penelope was silent for a moment, collecting the strength to speak. "I met this girl...Josie. She was struggling like I was at first, and I was trying to make her feel better.", Penelope relayed, twisting the silver ring on her finger nervously. "She mentioned something about Micah looking like his...", Penelope trailed off, squeezing her eyes shut tight. Jed placed a hand on her arm, bringing her back to the present once again. "She didn't mean any harm, I know that. No one knows about what happened, but just hearing the implication of it-" "It's understandable, Pen.", Jed assured her, pulling his younger cousin into a tight hug. "You don't have to tell anyone what happened if you don't want to- especially not someone that you just met. Unfortunately, though, people are going to wonder and make their assumptions." "I know.", Penelope whispered, swallowing hard. "Can you...maybe stay here tonight? I hate to ask, but I don't feel safe staying here alone with Micah tonight." "Yeah, It's getting pretty late, anyway.", Jed agreed, taking both now empty cups from the coffee table. "Let me just text Alyssa not to expect me home tonight." "Okay, I'm gonna go get Micah ready for bed.", Penelope said, excusing herself out of the room. 

When she entered her bedroom, she peered into the crib to find Micah still awake, staring at his mobile in fascination. Penelope carefully lifted her son from the crib, humming softly as she changed his diaper and placed him into fresh pajamas. She quickly mixed a bottle, sitting herself on the bed so she could feed him comfortably. While he was eating Penelope rocked the baby softly, running her fingers over the tiny auburn hairs on his head. Micah had many features of Penelope- his greyish green eyes, the tanned tone of his skin, even the little upturned smirk of his lips. He was so obviously Penelope's son except for one telling feature- the hair atop his head. Penelope had hoped that it would darken as the weeks passed, but it seemed that it was going to be a permanent feature. The thought made Penelope's stomach turn. As much as she loved her son- so much that it physically hurt at sometimes- knowing that her child had the DNA of his father as well made Penelope feel sick. Penelope held her son close, hanging her head down in shame. Penelope wondered how such an evil person had taken part in the creation of the beautiful soul in her arms. 

And how could she possibly protect him from the horrible things in the world when she had already fallen victim to them herself?


	4. I think I owe you all an apology...

Hi, everyone. It's been a while since we talked. I'm very sorry about that. Once the pandemic hit, a lot of things went on the backburner- my writing included. I've been so majorly stressed out with family, Corona, and then the holidays that I haven't had the mental clarity to write anything. 2020 was rough. I moved out of my mother's house, started a whole new life in a new city, and learned a lot of lessons and met a lot of people along the way. Now i'm ready to say goodbye to 2020 and get back to doing what I love- creating stories to entertain all of you. Please bear with me as I sort myself out and get everything together for the near future. Updates will be slow and infrequent- as they've always been- but I promise to put the very best of myself into every chapter, every paragraph, and every line. I'm glad to be back, and I hope you join me in this new and exciting chapter of my life. 

Love Always, Iries.


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